March Movie Preview

Spring Movie Preview
by: Melissa Lanouette

Curious about what to see in the upcoming month? Red Skies has looks at ten movies slated to come out in this blustery month. So grab your popcorn and head to the theater to catch these films (or don’t)!

March 2

Zodiac: A typical “Catch the Killer” movie, this film features Jake Gyllenhaal in is his movie release since 2005. Based on the real murders by the Zodiac killer in San Francisco, this movie follows a long line of bad horror or thriller movies based on these events. However, early reviews are hopeful, they like the blend of thriller, police procedure, and newsroom drama that the film portrays.
Melissa’s Prediction: Like many movies that blend standard conventions, this will draw fans, but no one will really know what to think of it, and it won’t be the box office success the studio hopes it will be.

Black Snake Moan: This unconventional, Southern movie features Samuel L. Jackson and Christina Ricci. Jackson plays Lazarus, a god-fearing, middle-aged man who discovers Rae (Ricci) left for dead on the side of the road. While nursing her back to health, he learns she is the town tramp with a bevy of psychological problems. He decides to, “Cure her of her wickedness,” and plans to do it by chaining her to his radiator.
Melissa’s prediction: Though this movie will undoubtedly find fans, it’s too far from center to gain much commercial success.

March 9:

300: Based on Frank Miller’s (Sin City) graphic novel, the movie 300 chronicles the famous last stand of the Battle of Thermopylae, where the King of Sparta leads 1,000 men of Greece into a battle against 100,000 Persians. Gerard Butler (“Phantom of the Opera”) leads the Spartans, shown in the sepia-toned trailer as gloriously furious, in only a loincloth and a red velvet cape. Featuring gratuitous violence, nudity, and mythical creatures, this movie promises to be an high-velocity rush.
Melissa’s prediction: Although it does blend weird/arty filmmaking with super-violence like “Sin City”, 300 likely frightens away its audience with its R rating and faded color scheme. However, if it is good, it will be very good, and might be the surprise hit of this month.

Miss Potter: In the spirit of “Finding Neverland”, Miss Potter tells the story of the life of Beatrix Potter, the author of “The Tale of Peter Rabbit”. Unlike “Finding Neverland”, Miss Potter completely glosses over any bad aspects of Beatrix Potter’s life, and leaves the reader with the sugary condensed version. Featuring Renée Zellweger in the titular role and Ewan Macgregor as her publisher and eventual husband, this film is well acted and adorable.
Melissa’s Prediction: Despite the talent and sweetness, this is a movie for neither children or adults, catering mainly to the type of people who would have a “Hang in there!” kitten poster, namely old women and preteen girls, neither of whom is likely to spend much money seeing it.

March 16th

I Think I Love My Wife: Writer/Director/Star Chris Rock really steps up to make this picture happen. Richard Cooper (Rock) is a married man with a beautiful wife and two kids. When he meets the ex-mistress of his friend (Kerry Washington), he finds his dedication tested, and begins to fantasy about what it would be like to be single. Gina Torres (“Serenity”) stars as his wife in touching comedy.
Melissa’s Prediction: With so few comedies out this month and Chris Rock’s name attached, I Think… is a surefire winner at the box office.

Dead Silence: From the writer/director of Saw, this movie plays up the creepiness inherent in ventriloquist dummies. After the death of his wife, Jamie Ashen returns to his hometown to try to unravel the mysteries surrounding her death. Dark, quick-cutting shots certainly lend themselves to a creepy atmosphere, and viewers will be reminded both of Saw and the popular Japanese remakes that abound now.
Melissa’s Prediction: Puppets and ghosts aren’t nearly as scary as being forced to chop off your own foot. With an R-rating barring younger viewers, I suspect that only hard-core horror fans will be in attendance.

March 23

The Hills Have Eyes 2: A rehashing of a rehashing, The Hills Have Eyes 2 tells the story of a group of young, hot teenage National Guardsmen who are finishing up desert training in some ill-fated mountains. Following a distress signal, they are led to a mountain range populated with the self-same mutants who killed the Carter Family in “The Hills Have Eyes”. It’s rumored to be twice as violent as the first, but it hasn’t received a rating yet, which either means the studio is trying to cut it back to an “R” rating, or cut it back to a “PG13” rating.
Melissa’s Prediction: The first one was popular. This one will be popular. Am I the only person who thinks Hollywood shouldn’t be enable the kind of people who get off on watching models getting violently tortured?

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: With the renewed interest in both the Turtles and big-budget superhero movies, it was only a matter of time before everyone’s favorite amphibians (sorry, Geico Gecko) made their way to the big screen (all right, turtles are really reptiles). Reappearing in cartoonish CGI, the Turtles are faced with a problem: what to do now that they’ve defeated their arch-enemy, Shredder. Luckily for us, alien-monsters invade the hometown of the T.M.N.T.’s, and they get to save the earth, again. A stellar voice cast, including Patrick Stewart and Sarah Michelle Gellar, add life to the animated people and animals.
Melissa’s Prediction: A great family film, this will also probably draw the college crowd who first grew to love the turtles.

March 30

Blades of Glory: A vehicle for Will Ferrell, with a side of Napoleon Dynamite’s Jon Heder, is a comedy about two male figure skaters that are forced to skate as a pair because of a feud. Rampant with the adolescent comedy that Ferrell is known for, this movie covers both the main characters feud and their attempts to become the first male/male skating pair in Olympic history. Poses that seem natural for male/female couples become ridiculous and provocative between Ferrell and Heder.
Melissa’s Prediction: Figure skating is much funnier than NASCAR. I suspect this FerrellFilm won’t disappoint any of his fans.

Meet the Robinsons: Disney’s newest CGI creation (without the help of Pixar) tells the story of a boy genius, Lewis (Jimmy Neutron, anyone?). This genius is in a foster home, and desperately wants a family. He creates a machine to help him access his earliest memories, including those of his family, but the machine sets off a series of strange. Lewis is sucked into a wild and psychedelic future, where he meets the equally wild Robinson family. A showdown with a man who frequently steals his inventions leads him to discover things about himself and his family.
Melissa’s Prediction: Like most of the new Disney movies, this film will be entertaining and profitable, but won’t reach the ‘classic’ status that Disney has been missing so often lately.